In a relationship between two people, every detail is important: words, looks, touches. How often do you hold hands? Are you holding on at all? In a relationship, holding your partner's hand means a lot, and the way you hold hands can tell a lot about your feelings, reports Day.Az with reference to Marketium.
1. Palms facing down
The one whose palm faces down is the dominant one in your relationship. This position of the palm expresses the desire to protect the partner and is more typical for men. He takes her hand to lead her across the road or through a crowd of people.
2. Intertwined fingers
Couples who intertwine their fingers when holding hands express a very deep connection with each other. It is no longer physical attractiveness that keeps them close - their relationship has long moved to another level. They care about each other and are honest with each other.
3. One holds the other's fingers
If your partner leads you by holding only a few fingers rather than your whole hand, that means something. You are both independent, courageous, and have your own passions and interests that go beyond the boundaries of your relationship. Most likely, you both like to be alone and try to maintain your individuality. But at the end of the day, you will definitely end up together, because your relationship is strong and reliable.
4. One holds the other's finger
If you hold your partner by one finger, this means that you have an incredibly calm relationship, with a dose of romance and playfulness. Your significant other may periodically take you by the finger, as if flirting with you.
5. Neck grab
As with intertwined fingers, this type of hug means that you are very close, but this option no longer fits the concept of holding hands. If you are hugged in this way, it means your partner is expressing his or her protection towards you, but if you hug your significant other in this way, it means you are proud of your relationship and will protect him or her from any danger at the cost of your life.
6. Passive contact
In this hand position, you gently but firmly hold your partner's hand. You don't impose on each other, but you both have established rules and boundaries. In this way, you add tenderness to your relationship without showing it off.
7. She is mine
This is the most common way to hold hands. It can be seen especially often in wedding photographs, where she miniature hand lies on top of his strong palm: this is how lovers express vital energy in their relationships, as well as a desire to protect each other. Such relationships are characterized by mutual respect, trust and admiration.
8. Fingers intertwined relaxed
You are expressing confidence. You completely trust each other, and your relationship has already achieved emotional stability. You know what to expect from each other.
9. Grip around the wrist
At first glance, it may seem that this way of holding hands is a little aggressive and expresses self-doubt. But this is far from true. You don't just intertwine your hands, you also connect them below the elbow. It expresses deep connection, passion and a great need to be close to each other.
Every couple shows affection in public differently. According to psychotherapists and sex experts, it is joint gestures that can tell a lot about the relationship between two people.
1. Intertwined hands.
If lovers hold hands, this indicates that they are together against the whole world. There is a real union between the partners. Intertwined hands symbolize traditional relationships and the deep inner affection of lovers.
2. Hands on the waist.
People hugging each other's waists are very sensual and loving. However, with this gesture, your partner also sometimes wants to show that you belong to him.
3. Holding hands.
At first glance, holding hands may seem childish. But it also shows affection, close connection and understanding between partners. Some scientists say that with holding hands, the opposite is true - it indicates a lack of passion and emotional connection between partners.
4. Interlocking fingers.
This gesture indicates a relationship that is full of determination and passion. The intertwining of fingers proves the seriousness of the partners' intentions.
5. Eye contact.
Eye to eye gaze allows partners to receive information about each other without words. Couples who are already together long time, recreate the feeling of falling in love, looking into each other's eyes.
6. Kisses.
Carelessness about kissing in public proves deep affection. The lovers are not shy about each other and show the whole world that they love each other.
7. Touching your knees.
An intimate touch on the knee, ear or shoulder shows that partners trust each other. When talking, they indicate that lovers know how to listen and listen to their other halves.
8. Stroking your back.
This gesture signals to the partner the desire for intimacy. A gentler pat on the back is a symbol of comfort, while a stronger pat is a symbol of a desire for control over the other person.
9. Stroking the neck.
Such touches cause a relaxation response. When a lover realizes that his significant other is stressed, he uses a calming touch. Couples who use this gesture are in harmony with each other's emotions. Such people are able to help and reassure each other.
10. Hugs from behind.
This gesture is unexpected manifestation love. He is unique and always makes you smile and gives you comfort.
11. Playing with fingers.
By playing with your partner's fingers or hands, or by talking to others, you make it clear that you are not hiding or ignoring him.
12. Lack of joint gestures.
Some couples think that the lack of joint gestures indicates a lack of intimacy and affection. This is not entirely true. Certain people feel good enough in their relationships that they don't need to make their feelings public. The lack of gestures does not mean that the couple has lost the spark; they are more secretive and conservative.
When we try to take someone's hand, we are invading their personal space, we must always remember this. This zone can be represented as air bubble, which each of us inflates and contracts depending on the circumstances. And we would rather agree to narrow its boundaries in a crowded subway car than, say, in an office.
Define the boundaries of personal space
The dimensions of personal space depend on the origin of the person, his social status, personal preferences, culture, and degree of familiarity with the person approaching him. According to the American anthropologist Edward T. Hall, on average up to 0.5 m is occupied intimate area, intended for those closest to you; from 0.5 m to 1.2 m - a personal area for communicating with close friends, from 1.2 m to 3.7 m - a social area suitable for business communication. Violation of these boundaries by strangers makes us feel uncomfortable.
For this reason, it is right to keep your distance at the beginning of a relationship. And touching another person's hand - even if it is not a romantic gesture at all - is preferable at the appropriate time and in the appropriate situation. Your attempt to touch someone you just met may irritate the other person, although he will smile sweetly back, not wanting to offend you. As the relationship develops, we allow the other closer to our intimate zone.
Find out the interlocutor's intentions
There is an easy way to find out whether the other person is ready to let you into his personal space - move your personal belongings (for example, a purse, a notebook, cigarettes) closer to him. Such objects are perceived by others as an extension of our body. When you sit with someone else at the same table, you follow the unspoken rule that half the table is yours and half is the other person's space.
“Invasion” of your items into your territory stranger will most likely perceive it with irritation, and you will notice his discomfort. Only close friends, family members and lovers are oblivious to these movements. If a woman moves her bag closer to a man, this may be a sign that she likes him and would like a closer relationship.
Consider cultural differences
Like all nonverbal gestures, tactile contact is perceived differently in different cultures. In the West, holding hands is a romantic gesture. When we see two people joining their palms, we can easily assume that they have a close relationship. Therefore, if you do not want to be misunderstood, do not hold hands with people you are not interested in, even if they are the first to make contact.
Many Western men do not hold each other's hands for fear of being mistaken for homosexuals. But in Arab culture, this is a friendly gesture that has nothing to do with sexual orientation.
What does this gesture mean? When a man takes a woman's hand, it can also mean several things:
- romantic affection and deep connection;
- uncertainty or fear of losing it;
- trying to calm her down when she's upset;
- superiority - he is the one who plays main role in a relationship;
- an attempt to show the whole world that she belongs to him and only him;
- showing off;
- he is proud to be seen next to this woman, but this does not mean that he values his relationship with her.
Taller or stronger?
Most books on body language will tell you that when partners hold hands, the leader's hand is always on top. However, a study by psychologists at Temple University (Philadelphia), conducted back in 1998, showed that there may be other factors that influence the way we hold hands:
Floor: The man's hand in a heterosexual couple is much more likely to be over the woman's hand (regardless of their relationship).
Height: in a couple where the man is taller or the same height as the partner, his hand is on top more often than in a couple where the man is shorter than the woman.
What to do if your lover doesn't want to take your hand?
Walking hand in hand through the streets is not a pleasure for everyone. Many people do not consider it necessary to publicly demonstrate their feelings, no matter how deep they may be. If your husband or wife avoids such poetic settings, this does not mean that he (she) does not love you. Most likely, he finds it difficult to relax in in public places. Perhaps he (she) is afraid that, having discovered his love for you, he will look weak, vulnerable, infantile. Changing this belief is not easy, but you can try the following:
- Before you grab your companion's hand in public, conduct the experiment described above to understand whether he is in the mood for tactile contact with you in principle. If he keeps his distance, don't take it personally. Instead of being offended, gently explain that the touch of loved ones is calming and helps you feel better.
- Work on your relationship as a whole: if you don't have the desire to hug and touch each other when you're alone, then it's hard to expect that desire to appear in public.
- Be honest with yourself: do you want to hold your partner's hand in public because you love him or because you want to show others that this is your boyfriend/girlfriend? Or to prove that you have power over him? If your intentions are not pure, your partner may feel hurt.
How to determine a man's character from the first meeting? You need to carefully monitor his gestures. Scientists have argued for decades about whether it is possible to judge character by gestures, but today it is known for sure that it is possible.
Manipulating one's own appearance
First of all, involuntary gestures reveal the attitude of a man towards a woman. If a girl is pleasant, a representative of the brutal half of humanity begins to perform various (often unnoticeable) manipulations with her appearance. Someone will smooth their hair, someone will adjust their shirt or belt, or touch their own hair or parts of clothing. The young man seems to be signaling that he liked the girl and is ready to look his best for her.
When a man meets a young lady who fully corresponds to his erotic ideals, his skin sensitivity greatly increases, and touches bring pleasure. Therefore, the partner begins to rub his eyes, forehead or chin, and touch his cheeks.
However, if the interlocutor not only touches his clothes or face, but tries to shake off invisible specks of dust, clenches and unclenches his fists, wipes his hands, bites his lips, this indicates that this moment small, at least insincere. Most often, young men who lie behave this way.
If a guy holds a girl's hand
If a man values his girlfriend, values her, and is afraid of losing her, then this is clearly noticeable in the way he strives to touch the girl while walking. He can hold her hand, put his hand on her shoulder or back. Some consider such a display of feelings to be bad manners. However, it is precisely such gestures that indicate sincere attitude gentleman to his passion.
The desire to protect the lady, to protect her, is manifested in such gestures as an attempt to cover her with a blanket or cover her with an umbrella from the rain. But if a guy gives his sweater or jacket to his girlfriend, this says more. The young man makes it clear that this girl belongs to him, that he is ready to share everything he has with her. That's why seeing someone else's jacket on a friend's shoulders causes disappointment or anger in most men.
Other male gestures
A man’s sexual desire and potency can be evidenced by the position a guy takes when talking to his partner. If your legs are slightly apart and your fingers are inserted into your belt or pockets, thumbs retracted at a right angle, which means that the male, which is in every representative of the stronger sex, is confident in himself, physically ready for further, closer contacts. With his hands he unconsciously emphasizes his brutality, manhood, sexual reserves. In addition, some psychologists are sure that this is how a man unconsciously points out those places that need affection. Such gestures are typical stronger sex not only when talking with the fair sex, but also in a dream.
If a man holds his thumbs behind his belt, this, on the contrary, indicates that the feminine principle in him predominates over the masculine. Such young people are often nervous, insecure, romantic and weak.
If the gentleman has feelings for his partner sexual attraction, then starts playing with round objects. This could be a glass that he rolls from hand to hand, or other objects that are subconsciously associated with female roundness.
Some men like to sit with their chin resting on their bent fist. This pose testifies to the brutality of the male, the dominant role of the phallic principle in his life.
If the young man props his chin with only two fingers, this means that the gesture contains a subtle (and unconscious) allusion to the female genital organ. Perhaps at this moment he is imagining an intimate continuation of the date.
The interlocutor demonstrates his subconscious disagreement or wariness by propping his head with one finger.
Clasped hands indicate self-doubt. Thus, the guy, as it were, encourages himself, subconsciously convincing him of the unity of the masculine and feminine principles (Yin-Yang).
Crossed arms with fingers hidden in the armpits are characteristic only of those guys who feel their complete superiority over others. This gesture indicates that the subject is closed to communication.
Despite the fact that smoking is undoubtedly a harmful habit, observing smoking man very interesting.
If he holds a cigarette with two fingers in the middle of his mouth, lifting its tip up, then there is a lot of childishness in the young man’s character. They seem to suck on a cigarette like a baby sucks on a pacifier, which most often indicates infantility and capriciousness.
A strong, confident man smokes decisively, holding the cigarette in the corner of his mouth for a short time.
Some poorly educated males who are not popular with women are characterized by various “picking habits.” During a conversation, such subjects may pick their nose or ear, put a finger in their mouth, scratch intimate parts. More educated people make such gestures in private. In both cases, the gestures indicate that dissatisfied individuals are constantly preoccupied with thoughts about intercourse. Perhaps this is why in almost all countries such gestures are considered vulgar and are not welcomed in society.