Nowadays, finding a soul mate is not very easy, so many single people meet through special sites, through friends or social networks. And some of them have to agree to blind dating, although many consider this method of dating to be very risky and ineffective.
A date is an exciting and wonderful event at the same time. And a blind date, most likely, can cause you doubly stress and anxiety, because you have not seen each other before and do not know who will come to the meeting.
For men, as for women, a first date is just as exciting. They also wonder whether you will like each other and whether you can make a good impression on each other.
But still, women are more inclined to fantasize about a romantic theme and idealize the situation - it is likely that the girl already has an image in her head of an irresistible stranger who will win her heart when she meets. That is why I would like to pay more attention to the description of such an acquaintance from a female point of view, so that false hopes and ideas do not spoil the objective picture.
Distinctive features of blind dates
A blind date is a meeting of 2 people who have not met before, and often did not even exchange photos with each other before meeting. Sometimes, such an acquaintance is arranged by friends or relatives who think that this man and woman will suit each other and will be a good couple.
Similar meetings are also organized by dating agencies that organize parties with a large number of single people, where they meet through informal communication.
Blind dating is arranged for different purposes - some women are looking for a man to start a family, some are just looking for a sexual partner, and many do not want to think ahead and simply prefer to first get to know each other better, and then decide which category to classify their new friend into. . After all, only in person can you understand whether it is worth further communication or not.
Everyone has their own approach to this type of dating. Some people think that some people agree to a blind date only out of desperation, others believe that this is an excellent dating method that often brings successful and strong relationships. If you don’t manage to start a family, then it is quite possible to remain good friends with the person and, thereby, expand your social circle.
Psychologists believe that this kind of dating should be treated as a game and you should not expect anything serious from such an acquaintance. Because dating is like a lottery: some are lucky, others are not. This attitude towards meeting people blindly will not allow you to become disappointed in yourself or the people around you; in addition, when communicating, if you tune in to a positive “playful” mood in advance, you will be able to behave more naturally.
Blind dating is not shameful, it's just a way to meet new people, so don't be shy about it. However, we must not forget about some safety measures.
How to behave?
On a date, behave modestly, but maintain a conversation with the man. Try to be natural and friendly, because your interlocutor is also nervous and worried - do not forget about this.
Do not complain or be capricious under any circumstances, because a man will not like a woman who behaves like this on the first date. It is quite possible that he will have a natural question: “What will happen next?”
Imagine the situation: a man was preparing and planning a date, carefully choosing a place for you to have a great time together, but this restaurant/cafe/theater where he invited you was subject to your harsh criticism. It's a shame, isn't it? Therefore, find pleasant little things in everything that happens and smile sweetly so that the man feels that you appreciate his efforts.
A man by nature is a protector and patron, so turn to him for advice, ask for his opinion on this or that issue. He will be pleased to feel like an interesting interlocutor, and you will be able to better know the life position of your new acquaintance.
Many men like to brag, so they talk about their own achievements and acquisitions. They love to receive compliments no less than women, so praising them in a timely manner is also important.
Before your date, be sure to exchange phone numbers. This is necessary not only in case of problems with the meeting, but also for your own safety: leave your phone number with your friends or relatives.
If you have seen a photo of a person, it is not a fact that in reality he will be the same as in the photograph: almost all people post on dating sites only successful photos or those taken a long time ago. They also provide false information about age, height, weight, etc. If during communication you realize that a person has posted incorrect information about himself, then this does not characterize him from the best side.
There are also people who come to a meeting in advance and hide, for example, in an inconspicuous place, and then identify the person who came on the date based on the characteristics described in the telephone conversation.
If the candidate suits them, they come up and introduce themselves, and if not, then they simply disappear without calling. Mostly men do this.
How to behave if upon meeting you realize that you don’t like the person? In such a case, you need to come up with a duty option in advance, thanks to which you will say goodbye and quickly leave. Say that you got a call from work and were told to come immediately. Or refer to unexpected problems at home.
The person will understand that you are lying, but he will not have any evidence - he will understand your tactful hint. But if you don’t like a man by appearance and behaves inappropriately, then tell him directly: “Sorry, nothing will work out for us, goodbye.” And leave, trying not to enter into discussions and arguments with him.
You also need to stop communicating if they start criticizing you: making comments about your appearance, clothing or behavior. This is completely inappropriate on a first date.
What to do if a man calls you home?
This moment should alert you. Also, you should not invite strangers to your place at the first meeting. He's definitely not in the mood to just have tea with you. Such a date could end in rape, robbery, or something like that. So it is necessary to make an initial meeting only in a public place. If a stranger is against it and asks to come to your home or invite you to his place, then in this case it is better to refuse the meeting altogether.
Many women dream of a stranger inviting them to a cafe or restaurant and treating them well. But today's men are in no hurry to do such things, especially not at the first meeting. Therefore, if you are invited to take a walk in the park, do not be embarrassed, because you don’t know each other at all yet. Perhaps he will invite you to a cafe or restaurant on your next date.
Keep in mind that if your gentleman starts his order with alcoholic drinks, then he may well have problems with alcohol. Not only does he now have a bad habit, but things could get even worse in the future, especially since drunk people can behave inappropriately. Also, do not relax, if a man ordered a great dinner (even without alcohol), most likely he expects that you will have to pay him at night.
The best option is to drink coffee together. The price will be inexpensive, and over a cup of coffee you can talk and get to know your interlocutor better.
5 secrets for successful blind dating
Improvising a blind date should be prepared in advance, adhering to some rules, the date will go well.
- Secret No. 1. Planning
A first blind date must be planned. You should decide in advance such issues as choosing an outfit, the place of the date and financial costs.
Clothes: you need to choose the best option so as not to scare off a man with bright makeup or an overly short dress, but you shouldn’t dress completely unremarkably either.
- Secret No. 2. Safety
All people are individual, no matter how many conversations you have, this is not a sign that you already know the person well and know that he is adequate and does not suffer from mental disorders.
Therefore, the meeting must be scheduled in a public place and not in the dark. If suddenly something goes wrong, you can easily disappear into the crowd and observe his behavior and manners in a public place.
- Secret No. 3. Meeting process.
It’s better to come to your date earlier to look around and assess the situation, and, of course, make a good impression on the man. If you have been communicating for a long time and know a lot about the person, you should not behave the way you behave with close friends.
After all, you are still strangers and you don’t know whether you will be able to communicate just as well after meeting each other. It’s better to greet him with a sweet smile, and if everything suits you, then move on to the next stage.
- Secret No. 4. Dialogue
This is the most important aspect of dating. After all, a lot depends on how you carry on the conversation. But it often happens that at the first meeting a person does not maintain a dialogue and is unable to behave naturally. It takes time to adapt.
Therefore, before the date, prepare topics for conversation (improvisation is good, but prepared “improvisation” is even better), you should also ask questions, but do not overdo it so that the man does not feel like he is being interrogated.
If it is difficult for you to choose topics for conversation and you have never communicated, then it is best to go to the cinema or to an exhibition, and there you will find a topic for conversation by itself.
- Secret No. 5. Ending
The meeting may go differently, but thank the young man anyway. If you liked everything, then agree on the next date, but if you don’t like the person, then hint to him about it so that he does not make further plans.
First blind date: what can you find out about your interlocutor?
Thanks to your curiosity and attentiveness, characteristic of almost every girl, you can find out some details that will help reveal some details about an unfamiliar person:
Preferences in sports
If a man is involved in a single sport (swimmer, runner), he is very protective of his freedom and likes to spend his free time alone with himself. Those who play team sports love competition in life. And a man who is not interested in sports is a sensual person with an independent character.
Author of the article: Svetlana Orlova
The topic of online dating has been the subject of discussion for many years. As with any issue, this idea has its supporters and opponents, and one can agree with each opinion.
On the one hand, it is stupid to argue that the Web is the only place that some individuals visit. Considering the century of progress and the ability to arrange delivery for absolutely any product and service, if you had the money, you wouldn’t have to go outside or go to the grocery store for weeks. On the other hand, there may be an 80 percent chance that a heroin addict is behind George Clooney's sexy profile picture.
So how can comrades who are lonely, confused in relationships and life, and passionately want to create a unit of society, be lonely?! Should you trust your well-being to the World Wide Web?! While researching this issue, I decided to conduct my own experiment, involving a friend from first grade, Natalya, who has been dating a guy for 7 years, but does not marry him, and spends every day doubting whether she has met the right person.
So, the first day of the experiment. I carefully filled out a form about my desire to meet on a well-known website, talked about what a thrifty, meek, sexy sweetie I am, in need of love and affection, posted a photo from the latest, where I was wearing all my best at once to celebrate my mother’s birthday, and began to wait.
Oleg, 36 years old, married, is looking for a cheerful, cheeky girl for pleasant meetings on her territory: “Your loneliness is over, baby! The macho guy has paid attention to you!”
Arthur, 23 years old, lean, lives with his parents, has inconsistent earnings: “If you want, I will become your licking slave... you won’t regret it!”
Arsen, 35 years old, three children, cheerful entrepreneur: “And you’re pretty, do you want me? Shish kebab-mashlyk.”
Yuri, 40 years old, a mechanic with a stable average income (sitting against the backdrop of a shabby wall, in an alcoholic T-shirt with a beer in his hand): “I’m ready to get married even tomorrow!”
I feel that my mood is changing dramatically, and I decide to postpone the search for today. The phone rings and on the line, happy Natasha reports that she met Him, an 8th generation count, and a romantic date is scheduled for the evening. I am sincerely happy for my friend, wish her good luck, make a promise that she will call me back with a story about miracles, and with my peripheral vision I look at myself in the mirror, a little worried about my own self-esteem.
Second day. In the morning I open the page of a dating site. I find 62 messages similar to yesterday, send the authors to the “black list”, and also weed out candidates with silence instead of a clear “no” in the “marital status” column, and now three remain. From the photo, they look like decent people who are interested in my affairs. The idyll of virtual “fairy tales” was interrupted by a call from a friend and a story about a wonderful evening yesterday with a gallant oligarch gentleman, which encouraged me a little in my search. The friend did not even notice how the clock struck and the princess, like Cinderella, was late home from the ball, for which she received a reprimand from her common-law husband and was punished - without going out.
The next week passed slowly. To the three previous boyfriends, two more “decent-looking” ones were added; we told each other about our affairs, hobbies, days spent and other nonsense, but our hearts did not flutter and did not strive to meet anyone. Then three somehow dropped out, because there was nothing left to squeeze out of the lemon. Meanwhile, Natalya reported that everything is fine with the oligarch, they are playing Romeo and Juliet, who cannot see each other, but send tearful Valentine cards to each other.
Having listened to her stories, closer to the weekend I convinced myself that a bad experience is also an experience, and decided to meet with Roman, 43 years old, recently divorced, an “ordinary” guy, in his words, but with a clearly pumped up body, in my opinion, judging by according to photo.
All day Saturday I, like a freshman, was worried, doing masks, peeling, hair removal, styling my hair, doing makeup and choosing a dress. Then I sat for another 2 hours in full uniform on the sofa, catching the child’s surprised gaze. And now the hour has come, the man of my dreams is at the entrance. I'm leaving.
As soon as I opened the door of the groom’s car, I remembered the words from the fairy tale: “...and this is my frog in a box that has arrived!” Have you ever driven a Niva where the lower part of the front seat moves in different directions, and the part that should support your back is missing?! This is the option. While we were driving, I was just sitting on my haunches, clinging to the top handrail, like on a tram, while the open window, “because it doesn’t close,” created such a draft that my Carlson bangs already turned into nothing on the next street!
Well, I think: “Nothing, just think, what a great deal! Maybe it’s testing for selflessness, the main thing is that the person is good!” Let's go to the cafe. There, my companion, having made an order, gave the menu to the waitress, obviously forgetting that he had brought me with him. I sit in silence. Moreover, I hear compliments and obvious hints that we liked it and can continue the evening with him. When vodka “for getting to know each other” and saltiness appeared on the table, despite the “suitcase” we arrived in, I decided – that’s it! It's time to do your feet!
I walk down the street, dressed up and beautiful, clearly not wanting to leave Saturday evening with such memories. And I decide to meet a man with a nickname on the dating site “Arnold”, who has long dreamed of meeting a girl like me! I’m sitting on the Embankment, waiting for Arnold in anticipation of a vengeful meeting with Romashka and I see... Oh, a miracle! Clearly looking for me in the crowd, something is approaching! Vaguely, very vaguely reminiscent of a photo from a website 10 years ago! I already understand that the evening is lost, hiding behind the backs of passers-by, I run away from the meeting place so that an unshaven man with a dirty head in socks and rubber flip-flops would never notice me.
It's been 2 weeks since I was on the site. For Natasha and the oligarch, love blossomed and sang. True, when her boyfriend finally allowed her to go to a “classmate’s birthday party,” the loving entrepreneur from the site suddenly left on a business trip. But the great power of the Internet made it possible to maintain at a distance the spark that had ignited so well during one meeting between them.
Convincing myself that I was trying for all humanity, I decided to continue the experiment. Former co-scribes were on the website, but, fortunately, they didn’t write to me; there were others talking about their difficult fate, single men. Everyone persistently asked for a meeting. But I decided that I would not allow such mistakes again and would meet only if I was clearly confident in the adequacy of the potential groom, having conducted a telephone interview. But so far there was no one to call for testing; too many facts incompatible with my life principles were revealed after two or three messages.
Several more days passed. Without giving up my position, in the evenings after work I opened a page on a dating site with the hope that something would happen today and, looking at the photo, I would feel MINE. But there were no results.
Exactly 2 months after the start of the experiment, the doorbell rang. No, this was not the man of my dreams! This was my co-conspirator in the experiment, Natalya. By the look of her, I immediately realized that we were going to drink! And we'll drink a lot!
The story with the prince turned out to be banal. Two weeks of virtual cards, two of kisses on the phone, another month of restaurants and passionate sex, and then... sudden oligarchic troubles and the need to “get five thousand bucks for a couple of hours”! “What questions... I know you! Only the tire on your car costs more, dear!” – thought Natasha, inspired by stories of unearthly love, and gave her common-law husband’s stash to her beloved. Only not an hour later, not after 5, not the next day, the oligarch did not get in touch, and the car, according to information from our mutual friend who had connections in the traffic police, turned out to be registered to Bella Kharisovna Ivanova... Who she is is a mystery!
I am grateful to my friend that she understood her own gullibility and stupidity and did not blame me for involving me in the experiment. She herself deleted the profile from the site and made a verdict that this method of dating is not only full of even greater disappointments, but also dangerous!
For the first time in a long time I went to work in high spirits and smiled at the sun! It’s still true that you shouldn’t look for your love, but meet it! Right on the threshold I ran into my colleague Sasha, having lunch at the same table with whom was the dream of all women, regardless of social status and age, because... he is a real handsome guy from Hollywood films. No one knew if he had a girlfriend, because due to his upbringing, Sasha smiled at everyone, but he did not arrange a single date during his 3-year career, despite the efforts of the ladies.
And suddenly, smiling at me with his charming smile, he asked: “Would you agree to go to dinner with me? I’ve liked you for a long time, but I thought you had someone, and yesterday I saw your profile on a dating site!” ...
So I don’t understand, maybe my experiment was a success after all?!
(0)
“A beautiful girl will meet an intelligent, kind, charming, modest, without a husband (further on the list) man for communication, and, possibly, marriage. About Me…"
This is the approximate text of a typical dating ad placed in a dating newspaper or on a dating site. Such advertisements, as a rule, are designed specifically for flirting, since a more serious relationship here would be in the nature of a rash step. Of course, if there is no primary goal of marrying a bag of gold.
And flirting... Why not. It does not impose any duties and - God forbid - any responsibility. And it's not difficult - it's interesting. True, the interest is primarily in yourself, and not in your partner. As a way to raise self-esteem, this option is a win-win. It’s hard to believe, but this is also a good way to relieve emotional fatigue and depression. What can we say about what a good way to occupy a girl’s leisure time! And everything would be fine if such an idyllic picture were not sometimes overshadowed by a simply frightening discrepancy between what was written in the ad and what was seen.
What a nightmare! And no one can really vouch for it. What a blow to the tender dreams of women. How many times do you need to get burned so that at the next “successful” acquaintance you do not fall into a state of numbness and quiet, peaceful rage? How many letters do you need to send to someone’s mailbox, how much do you have to come up with the right (charming and bewitching) words, how much do you rummage through an album of your old photographs in order to find a picture where you look like a lily of the valley in May, how much do you regret that it’s the only one...
Yes, what can’t you do exclusively for yourself... To raise your vitality. But now, you see him, the object of your potential sexual attraction or even secret dreams and fantasies, with your own eyes and... all desire is completely repulsed. And what a pity it is for that one and only photograph where you are like a lily of the valley in May!
After several such great shocks, it is sometimes difficult to return to the normal rhythm of life. And how can you not think: “I’ve had enough!” However, you can think whatever you want, but you can’t go against nature. A simple human desire not to feel completely alone takes over. But so that there are no mental turmoil!
And hands reach for the computer...
Online dating – virtual thrill at any time of the day. Dating sites are available at any time. If you want, sit quietly at work, or at home in one nightie until dawn... And talk, communicate, love... and everything virtually, on-line!
And the best dating sites are immediately found, and many friends and desirers immediately appear. Virtual. They are all quite immodest, and in some ways even too frank. Of course, in this situation I like it. There is no one to be ashamed of: he is somewhere out there, alone with the computer, and you are somewhere here, or rather, already all in your wildest fantasies, also alone with the computer. As you can see, everything is quite harmless and, at the same time, very pleasant. Addictive, in a word. But how long can you revel in empty dreams and your own fantasies? Having passed this stage, the next stage comes - I really want to see each other for real. In life.
The long-awaited moment and...
And... Oh God... Everyone comes up with the ending themselves. Alternatively: “Well, bye?” – “Bye” – “We’ll call you…” – “Yes, yes, yes, definitely. Bye bye". Naturally, no one will dare to take responsibility for the call. Not because both are so indecisive, but because “I didn’t really want to...”.
I have an idea!
So, you completely reject the option of meeting one-on-one, but you definitely want to meet someone, find a man. You can go another way: arrange a collective meeting. The option is much more of a compromise, and also smacks more of romance. Still, the influence of the element of chance here is much more significant. Many cities claim to be the most romantic city. However, Paris still ranks first.
But romantic acquaintances are also possible in Moscow. Such events, and they can be called flirting evenings, blind acquaintances or dating club parties, flirt parties, are a relatively new phenomenon in Moscow, and in the world. And on average 80-100 people take part in these dating evenings. Agree, there is a choice. Thanks to the romantic dating club, you can feel not only the subject of male/female gaze, but also a part of Moscow nightlife. Active participation in the city's nightlife only adds to the fun.
At club parties, you can allow yourself to distance yourself from people who are unpleasant to you, and demonstrate in all possible beauty what a wonderful person you are, and that it is a pleasure to do business with you, to those whom you want to impress. You can drink for greater courage, or not drink for greater precision. One way or another, at flirting parties you can choose any line of behavior. This is a significant plus.
Having been drawn into the atmosphere of club entertainment, you can forget about all your everyday problems, have fun, get carried away, and, perhaps, find a life partner or just a travel companion.
http://love.onru.ru/love/open/1543/?PHPSESSID=6ab27915ee75940d396e84b00e6c726f
Nowadays online dating is very popular. A huge number of people, every day, meet people online and go on blind dates.
And I am far from an exception here. I love going on dates, I love meeting new people and communicating with interesting people. Each date is its own separate story. Sometimes sad, sometimes happy, and sometimes downright funny...
I want to tell you about one funny incident that happened to me on one of these blind dates.
Everything started as usual. A nice photo of a guy, a profile, a banal “Hello! I am Vadim. How are you?”, which was soon followed by the sentence “Let’s go for a walk.”
This Saturday evening, my friend and I were planning to go to a restaurant, and in the afternoon, I decided to meet with Vadim.
I wrote to a friend about this (she also communicates on a dating site). She appreciated the gentleman and “blessed” me...
We agreed to meet a couple of stops from my house. I arrived by bus, I got off, and Vadim was not at the stop. I called my cell phone... I found it. We met…
We decided to go and play billiards. Two hours flew by while playing, fun and unnoticed. Suddenly Vadim’s phone rang. These turned out to be his friends who were also going to join us. I didn't mind the company.
However, when they entered the hall, I suddenly noticed something very strange. Vadim was walking with friends and some girl. Exactly the real one with whom I communicated on the Internet!
I looked at my gentleman in surprise. "And who are you?" . “Oh, I’m Sasha,” came the answer.
What surprised me most in this situation was not that the guys swapped girls, this is not uncommon when dating blindly, but that I was so frivolous and inattentive. After all, I spent about fifteen minutes looking at his photo, deciding whether to go on a date or not.
They don't even look alike, one might say - complete opposites. One is a tall brunette, and the other is a medium-height guy with blond hair. And it didn’t even occur to me!
I was not at all offended or upset by such an exchange (deception), and spent a great evening in a fun and interesting company.
I never made it to the restaurant. My friend came to us herself. Unlike me, she immediately understood who was who.
You should have seen her surprised eyes when she found out that I was with a completely different guy, and the one who invited me on a date was with another girl!
Even now, after two and a half years, we sometimes remember this story and laugh...
Was there a continuation of our acquaintance with Sasha, you ask? No... This was our first and last date...
I think this is for the best, because I still have so many interesting meetings and fun adventures ahead!
When meeting people online, the first date in real life is almost always a blind date.
Every girl gets very excited when going on a first date. Naturally, she dreams of finally meeting the one she has been waiting for all her life...
You are interested in other articles about the relationship between a man and a woman, such as:
Online dating. Blind date.
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